Tuesday, July 3, 2012

mirror, mirror on the wall

Josie, the other night you asked me to sing 
"The Little Mermaid" as you were falling asleep.

Are you kidding me? 
I've been preparing my whole life for this.

I closed my eyes to get into character, 
tucked your princess dress under your covers 
(yes, this is what you sleep in these days) 
and then began to quietly sing my heart out.

 My sweet audience of one 
watched with a half-smile on your sleepy little face.
And then you politely asked me to stop singing, 
as you were too sleepy to listen anymore.

All of this to say, you are obsessed with princesses.  
Or anything pink, purple, sparkly, lacy or frilly.

You also have an obsession with mirrors. 

Being in front of the mirror is like being home for you.
You sing, dance, twirl, make funny faces or just practice varies smiles.
 And you don't even need a real mirror.
A reflection from a window, the fireplace glass
or side of a car will do just fine.

If you're not being a very good listener
(which let's be honest, rarely happens),
I'll threaten to take the mirror out of your room.
It works. Nine out of ten times, it works.

Raising a little girl, I'm already sensitive
to what I "should be teaching" you.
I don't even know what that means,
but I have that thought stuck in my head.

So when the mirror obsession started,
My first thought was to hinder that desire.
Reasons being, we shouldn't be so into ourselves,
it's not about beauty on the outside, etc.

But then in the midst of my anxiety I realized,
when you look in the mirror,
your thoughts are simple, pure and innocent.

You're not thinking you're better than everyone else.

You see a little girl with a giant hair bow, a bazillion bracelets,
a princess dress (likely with a stain or two), and a big smile.

I'm not sure when this happens, but in every woman's life,
there's a moment when we stop looking in the mirror like you do now.
Instead, we see a mirror as a way to tell us what's wrong with our appearance.
To let us know what we need to fix about ourselves.
And we usually leave the mirror with an "oh well" expression.
Never fully loving what we see.

So with that said, please don't stop looking in the mirror. Ever.
Keep looking into the mirror and smiling.

Love yourself. It will get harder to do so with each year.

Remember to see yourself the way you do now. Lovely, in every way.

Be confident and know that you are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Proverbs 139:14

1 comment:

jdavissquared said...

Oh man, it's no doubt partially pregnancy hormones, but this post made me cry! Beautifully written.

And seriously, she gets cuter all the time!